The Double Edged Sword of Self-Doubt, Part One
I don’t have what it takes. I’m not smart enough, educated enough, important enough, experienced enough, brave enough, compassionate enough, or understanding enough.
By now you should be wondering why you’re even bothering to read this. Stay with me. It gets better.
I recently listened to a podcast entitled A Writer’s Guide to the End of Self-Doubt. In the interview, the guest says, “writing is like a task designed to confront your own feelings of self-doubt because you sit down and you face a blank page …” He spoke truth. Writers are, after all, creatives. We can imagine a long list of doubt causing possibilities.
But self doubt isn’t a malady suffered only by writers and other creatives. Doubt is an inherent part of the human condition. Every one doubts. And these days, we’re practically force fed a steady diet of doubtful delicacies.
The amount of contradictory information flowing through the veins of social media, steadily pumped out by competing agendas, has us bleeding doubt by the bucketful.
While not trusting the science is one thing, and a healthy dose of skepticism in regards to every piece of news or disseminated information can be … well, healthy, that’s not the doubt I’m talking about here.
It is self-doubt that becomes the sword that divides our soul and renders us ineffective, unproductive, or heaven forbid, completely useless.
And according to the man on the podcast, self-doubt will never go away. The question is simply how much time are we going to wallow in it.
Ouch.
This is side one of this double edged sword. And it’s not the good one.
I believe this is the side of the sword that King Saul fell on when the Philistines were pursuing him on Mount Gilboa (See 1 Samuel 31). Saul doubted, but who he doubted is the important thing to note here.
He doubted God (possibly with good reason since he hadn’t been a very good king or a nice person, but that’s a discussion for another time).
Saul correctly assessed his abilities. That self-doubt was wisely placed. He was alone with his armor bearer facing an army of blood thirsty Philistines. He was probably surrounded and trapped on the top of this mountain. On his own, he knew he was toast.
He forgot who his God was. The God that parted the Red Sea and brought down the walls of Jericho.
Let’s be honest, the one Saul really doubted was God.
Saul let his doubts render him completely useless. He wallowed in them until he left no room for God to move on his behalf. Plus, he set a bad example for his armor bearer who, after watching Saul take his own life, fell on his sword, too.
God’s Word is clear on this subject. Doubt is not a fruit of the Spirit and is to be avoided by being steadfast and unshakeable in our faith. And the best part, it’s overcome by asking.
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do. (James 1:6-8 )
We really shouldn’t be surprised that these weak and fleshly bodies attempting to navigate this broken and wicked world struggle with self-doubt. There is no end to the things we wrestle with despite our best efforts. Why should self-doubt be any different than our struggle with forgiveness, resentment, anger, over indulgence, comparison, envy, greed, and so on?
In 2 Corinthians 10:5, we are told to take every thought captive to obey Christ. In Song of Songs, Solomon writes that we must “catch the little foxes that ruin the vineyards (See Song of Songs 2:15). He’s referring specifically to the little things that ruin romantic relationships, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true for other areas of our lives as well.
We have to accept that self-doubt is a part of the human condition—a part of our condition. It’s not going away, at least not by our own efforts. But we shouldn’t wallow in it.
It’s time we saddle up for the fox hunt and drop the sword that seeks to divide us.
My challenge this week is for us to recognize our moments of self-doubt as a normal part of human life. Then ask ourselves who it is that we are really doubting.
Round up those little foxes and check back for part two of this post on February 15th.
Donna Nabors is a woman who refused to wallow in self-doubt no matter what life threw at her. For a chance to win a copy of her book, Shattered Dreams to Treasured Truths: Transforming Life’s Disappointments, leave a comment on this blog. If you’re feeling brave, tell me what self-doubts are keeping you from your living the life to the fullest that Jesus came to bring us. Or share your favorite verse for overcoming your self-doubts.
Until next time, keep your boots on the ground, head in the clouds, and heart in HIs hands.
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Lori, this message came across loud and clear to me. I gave self doubt and most of the time , I recognize it and slay the fox. Other times I wallow in it long enough to be miser…But Holy Spirit gently reminds me of who I am. Thank you for this message! I am looking forward to part two.
Thank you Mary Beth! So good to hear from you. I know I keep the Holy Spirit working double time, and far too often covering the same ground we covered before. It has been a game changer for me just to switch my perspective on how I view and feel about self-doubt. Can’t wait to share more.
Great post! Doubt does plague us all. When I hear the voice of doubt and discouragement, especially regarding obstacles that are beyond my human understanding, I like to quote Mark 9:24 to myself, “Lord, I believe, but help my unbelief.”
Thank you Kelly! And that is one of my very favorite verses. I can’t wait to meet this father when I get to heaven and thank him for being real and showing me I can to.
I doubt myself nearly every day. Do I really have what it takes to be published one day? No, I don’t in my own power, but in Christ’s power I can do all things. Thanks for your post. Very relevant to our everyday lives. God bless you.
Thanks Deena! So good to hear from you. You are doing so much with not only your writing, but the community of writers that you are building up. Of course, the enemy is going to whisper all sorts of doubts in your ear. But praise God, you don’t listen. You just keep doing what God has asked of you. Can’t wait to share part two… although it sounds like you’ve already figured it out. Blessings!
It is so easy to doubt myself as a writer if I look at sales. It’s nice to have positive feedback on my work, but that doesn’t usually translate into book reviews, which also helps with visibility and sales.
Thanks for joining the conversation Connie. And you are so right. Doubt is very easy when we look at book sales and even reviews. It is such a blessing that when we are writing for God, though, we can let go of those worldly measurements. It’s not easy and I have to repeatedly let go. I’m frustrated that my next novel isn’t out when I had hoped and planned. As I was venting this frustration to the Lord in prayer, He kindly asked me if I was upset because it was timeline that was off, or His? And, of course, we know God’s timing is always perfect. Point made. Thank you Holy Spirit.
Lori, I loved this piece. The assurance of God’s love reflects His commitment and can erase the voices who cry out, You are not enough – and never will be.”
Self-doubt has its roots in not believing God is who He says He is. If we are in Christ, our circumstances are right there with us. In Him, we can be confident that Christ is our champion.
Thanks you Deb, for your compliment and for adding your words of truth to the conversation. I am being blessed by reading through the things everyone is sharing here.